Here's to Lazy Dudes with Vision
posted by CUZED at 2:57 PM
The Average Dude Blog welcomes authenticity, creativity, and philosophical discussion of any kind. With this venue, we no longer have to sit in our bunkers drinking warm beer and smoking cheap cigarettes, wondering which will come first, death or understanding.
19 Comments:
ice and i found this wonder outside of neuman's bar and grill in downtown san pablo del norte. it was as if someone had read out minds, answered a great nagging question, spat the answer upon the sidewalk, and danced all over annheiser busch's grave.
a self-propelled cooler, with a hitch, handles bars and and rumble seat on the trailer. no more does the average dude lug an ice laden cooler full of beer. long live the new iceman!!!
is it amphibious?
regarding annheiser busch...5% cans of bud are now available in the guay at 3.50 a sixer..4 bucks for longnecks...Long Live Baviera!
wow, it's a bargain at twice the price. as to the cooler's frog-like nature, they wouldn't let us take a test drive but once Ice and I have some disposible income we'll confirm that actuality.
Dudes...self propelled electric I presume. Can you ride it? Great I got a dui on my cooler. 4 bucks for a 6 of bud...that's cheaper than in the US. I personally recommend Colt 45 in the 40 oz bottle. People back away when you hoist one of those.
Pollo did the bolsa para cerveza finally bite the dust? I saw a nice canvas shopping bag at the coop the other day would be perfect for such duty.
VIVA BRAHMA!
the potentiality of a dui only adds to the adventure. in this day and age, we oughta take what we can get and go for a joy ride. brahma, the bull?
oso,
great inquiry. the bag is currently being used to hoist potting soil as young minds experiment with plant growth rates and necessities. a certain observant individual spotted it at once, "ah, the beer bag!"
it currently is holding the remains of five or so kilos of soil. it is greatly missed by the neighborhood watch yokels.
the budweiser invasion knows no ends. the shit is everywhere, all of the sudden. and, i misquoted the price. 3.10 for cans and 3.20 for longnecks. again, long live baviera.
i presume that the budweiser invasion is a precursor to a military invasion that may very well be the result of Evo Morales' threat to close the Chaco border. local Cavalry boys have lost their summer vacation month in order to trot along the border and drink terere. unfortch, the boys from the north won't be satified with Selecta and it is already hot as hell here.
Not only can you ride on it, but you can have a passenger as well. It has air tires, a throttle for adjusting speed, and brakes. The engine is inside the front cooler, and it vents out the side. It has an electric start, but I believe it takes fuel.
Oh, and notice that each part has a beer holder that goes between your legs, and a flip up top, so you can grab more beers as you cruise around. Perfect for trick or treating.
did you dudes take it for a test ride?
regarding the Budweiser Blitzkrieg. As i set down the empties on the counter of the corner dispensa, Agustin (owner/operator/resident) whipped out a giant coaster with Bud icons on either side and the words, "La extranabas?"
of course i was not surprised, but lacked the foresight to prevent the shock. i gave a quick critique of the beer, quoted a usa price, and asked for some Baviera.
augstin, always alert, claimed that "todo el mundo dice que es la mas rica."
i shrugged in indifference and uttered a drawn out, "bueno."
i left a bit affected and indignant. "damnit, i was here first" i thought greedily to myself.
so i cruised home at a 32 degrees C heat at 8:30pm pace. as i rounded the corner where the chuchi cafe is i admired the lovely women entering and leaving, to be seen or having been seen. then it hit me. the giant bud coaster, as well as all the other adds i have seen in the past week or so, do not include revealing photos of beautiful women in a bit more than zero clothes.
this is the biggest marketing blitz i have witnessed since my years on Puerto Rico. those guys knew what they were doing. not only were the adds racey, but they posted women in bikinis with coolers filled with ice and the beer to be sold next to the window at gas stations, handing out sixers to dumbfounded dudes (only to be charged at the window).
then again, i am a long way away from PR.
i give bud six months to a year of glory here, and then everyone will go back to baviera once the hangover sets in.
No shit man. The hangover indeed. Imported Bud is horrible, especially when shipped to warm places. Baviera on the other hand is a luxury that I miss.
I must admit, however, that I've been drinking a lot of Bud lately. In fact, I could use one right now.
Thanks for the update Pollo. This Iceman shares your indignance. Maybe if I drink more Bud here, they'll try to sell less there, but then you're right. It will phase itself out, and then the dude in charge will get fired, and everyone will go about the business.
I want the Colt 45 franchise. We will only sell 40s. And we will use the the slogan Trabaja todo el tiempo. With a picture of a lovely Guay chick with giant tits.
The American ad is works every time and a picture of a black woman with big tits. 40 degree heat and a 45 will work. Have 3 and you are working overtime.
The only people drinking bud will be embassy, ASA and a variety of people who want to give up quality to be ostesibly cool. Bud would be better off importing Baviera to the US. But Brahma is still my favorite in the Guay.
Hey could you bore out the motor on the ice chest and add a nitrous booster?Two hosed booster that is.
Anything's possible Oso. I may have to try out one of those Colt 45's tonight to see what all the hype is about. Unfortunately, I have no one to intimidate in my neighborhood. It's too damn cold to hang outside, otherwise I could walk around the block with a 40 and at least gain some respect from the local hoodilums.
ice just bought two 40's in the hood.
i hear that bush sr. just bought 10,000 acres in the guay.
seems the us and the royal guayship have reached a deal that they won't deport ex-presidents to face crimes against humanity tribunals and/or charges.
supposedly jenna bush was seen drinking bud at a bar famous for its generous outbreaks of spontaneous beastiality and the adjacent though illicit herbal haberdashery, to say nothing of the nearly free local beer and that sinfully expensive bud.
of course the guayship denies, and washington insiders just laugh. there's no way anyone here cares what happens in the guay.
thus the bud my deegoes, yep, 1,000,000 free cases to the powers that be. marked up too boot, and sold to all the rock stars planning to make a getaway and then go home and beat the wife.
is it against the law to buy a country?
LATE BREAKING NEWS IN THE GUAY!
a fellow Average Dude (natethegreat...) and i were asked to stop and pick up some beer last night on our way to visit a certain Noufi friend. We go to the new super, head towards the booze section. right in the middle of the isle, roped off with thick regal golden ropes is a shopping cart with a velvet red pillow inside. resting peacefully on the royal pillow was a Stella Artois. Needless to say, we looked at eachother knowingly unknowingly. The price you ask, my brothers? hold on to your Colt 45's... I set out to see if they had some cold ones in the freezer while my accomplish tracked down an employee to find out the price. I found no cold Stellas, but he found the stash and the price...$4.50 a sixer. Needing to know the answers to the obvious questions, i read the fine print on the bottle. Turns out that they now brew the stuff in Argentina, most likely adjacent to the new Bud factory. we bought a cold twelve pack of Baviera in cans and a six of Stella. the Guay is in the midst of a three sided battle...Heini vs. Bud vs. Stella...Long live Baviera. bud is 3.50 a six. heini an even 4, and, again, stell 4.50...
ah the joys of a global ecomony. i'd be interested in knowing the results of your taste test.
Hell what's next Brew 102?
You must find out the name of the distributor of the Stella and the bud. This may be an Aargentine plot to destroy the local beer market. Still how much is a 6 of brahma or bohemia? Remember quantity AND quality are very important.
of course it's an argentine plot OSO, remember that's where all the Nazi's live.
if you want quantity and quality, brew your own beer.
that's what my buds in Utah do as that Mormon state has mandated all beer be 3.2% unless sold by the single bottle in a state run like-me store. cheapest bottle of beer for sale at full strength in the early mid to late 90's: $1.40 american.
makes a strong case for subverting the dominant paradigm and getting wiggy wit the home brew slew.
I meant lick-me store
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